My So-CaLLeD LiFe: November 2005

'twas indeed a long and tiring weekend...

Saturday
- two of my friends in sfc (ate dothy & alfred) came to our house to chat and have lunch (thanks Afiong...este Alfred)
- my sis jeng & i went to galleria, megamall & st. francis square to buy some accesories and stuffs we will need for my wedding...we had a sumptuous snack in sbarro... i never thought i miss the white cheese pizza so much!
- we had our Lord's day celebration in the evening and we headed to eastwood (with some bros & sis in sfc) to hang out

Sunday
- Kokoy & I submitted our wedding banns in Sts. Peter & Paul Parish. We heard mass and met my high school friend Farrah (with her mom, Tita Ellen) there as well.
- We decided to have lunch and have a little chit-chat in Rockwell...on second thought it wasn't a little chit-chat, we talked for almost 3 hours straight while munching food in between (you can't blame us...Farrah & I were not in contact for more than six years!)
- Kokoy & I had a Thai massage for an hour (this was not planned, we just saw the promo and decided to avail of it)
- At around 2 pm, we met my sis Jeng in Ate Joan's Dental clinic to refresh our teeth, hehehe
- Kokoy & I then proceeded to their house, we had dinner there and his family decided to go out...so we went to Tiendesitas and Greenhills and had midnight snack in Mc Do...they brought me home at around 1:00 am...I never felt so tired.

Monday (declared as holiday)
- we met with Kokoy's friend (for the choir in our wedding) together with Kat & Alfred who will sing with them
- we then procedeed to have lunch in Tiendesitas...we were supposed to visit a new bro in SFC in Medical City (who committed suicide, tsk tsk) but Alfred asked us to bring him home since he came from a 10:00 pm to 6:00 am duty.
- we went to Kokoy's house & waited for our designer there for the gown-fitting of our female entourage
- after the fitting, we headed to our place and kokoy & ate dothy joined us for dinner

... we still need to do so many things...i can't wait to take a leave so i can accomplish it!

pre-wedding jitters?

i'm in such a roller-coaster ride of emotions these past few days...last monday, i was really depressed knowing that there are still lots of things to accomplish for my wedding (kokoy & i were in a panic mode). yesterday, i felt okay and today i feel excited...confusing isn't it? my married friends were telling me that it's normal to feel this way... they've been telling me to be cool and cherish every moment of it...one of my friends even told me that kokoy& i should go out on a date and not talk about our upcoming wedding even for that period, she said it will keep both of us sane (they did this when they were in our stage)...i feel like i'm in limbo...waiting what's gonna happen next...i need a breather!

thank you SFC!

Getting married means letting go of SFC (Singles for Christ). It really saddens me to know that I'm not gonna be with my usual peer group for household (prayer meeting) and fellowship after the wedding. Kokoy & I owe a lot to this community...we met and nurtured our relationship here, we met true friends who stayed with us through thick and thin...we learned to help, appreciate and love people from all walks of life (thanks to Gawad Kalinga)...we learned to let go of living in extravagance and value the finer and nobler things in life...but most importantly this community made evident God's presence in our lives.

With my six years of stay in this community, I saw how it evolved from being a "prayer group" to being a dynamic one (the introduction of Gawad Kalinga really helped us to put into practice or to apply the teachings that were given to us). True, it is not a perfect community...there were those who will talk behind your back, some were even aiming for fame & power, there were boring activities, etc. but all these people are seeking God and all those boring activities are meant to teach us something. It is indeed a community of sinners searching for light, an imperfect community aiming for perfection through God's guidance.

Kokoy & I had our last chapter gathering last week. We thanked everyone in our chapter esp. those who became our heads and members. I really am grateful to all of them...for all the laughter and tears...for all the conferences we shared...for inspiring us...and for being good examples in living out their faith. I truly feel blessed for finding my second home for the past six years, as Kokoy & I enters a new home (Couples for Christ) rest assured that all the learnings we had from SFC will forever be embedded in our system. Thank you, SFC!

A little peek of my life in SFC:

our last conference...reloaded

with my fellow paulinians in sfc

jeng, ria & i with maureen of sfc canada

holloween party with co-sfcs from diff. chapters of east a

i wanna go to a beach!

I was browsing through Friendster and took a peek on some people's profiles. I actually checked my relatives and friends' profiles and saw their pictures on the beach. I couldn't help but envy them...why?....because the last time I went to a beach was I think four (4) years ago! It was the time I went to Palawi Island with my Tito Gani's family, my 'lil sis Trian, Lola Willie and my friend Yasmin. I had many invitations to go beach hopping but I turned them all down because I was saving for my siblings' tuition fees and expenses (sigh!). After my father's sudden demise, my life really took a 180 degrees turn. So those things that I used to enjoy like going out-of-town during weekends with friends, shopping, frequenting the salon and yes, going to the beach now took a backseat for the simple reason that, there are more significant things that I need to spend my money with.

I'm not indulging in self-pity here because I know I did the right thing. I have also recognized the fact that I will regret it more if my siblings' wouldn't be able to enroll. I really just miss the simple pleasures that being on the beach creates...hearing the waves, feeling the sun & sand on your body, late night walks and star-gazing, (sigh again)! I can still remember Yasmin's expression while seeing all those shooting stars in Palawi Island ( I think all the stars decided to fall there,hahaha)...that sight was truly priceless!

But hey, I might spend my honeymoon on the beach! Kokoy & I already made reservations to one of the private resorts in the North (it used to be exclusive for members and they just opened it for the public's pleasure very recently)...that is if we could still squeeze it in our budget, well, I'm keeping my hopes up. I couldn't wait! At least, I'm not having any guilt trips in going for this one...and hey, it's my honeymoon anyway:)

the man i'm going to marry...

I was touched with Kokoy's latest blog entry so I decided to write something about him as well:) I think it's about time to tell the world why I chose him to be the man I'll spend the rest of my life with.

I didn't like him at first (everybody knows about this, hahaha), in fact, I was really avoiding him whenever we have gatherings in Singles for Christ. But our bros and sis in the community were very persistent in pairing us up . He was also persistent and very consistent. His faith was also very strong, he never gave up on praying for me. He even had a novena dedicated to me, you could just imagine my surprise when he read it beside me when we were in Edsa Shrine! There really was a Divine Intervention for I find myself opening up and accepting him in my life.

We've been together for 5 years, 9 months and 11 days to be exact. He saw how I struggled during what I can call the most difficult stage in my life. I was clinically depressed, I had nightmares I could not even fathom and I was literally scared of sleeping. He would talk to me over the phone until the wee hours of the morning or until I will be so sleepy and tired or until the time he knew that I am not scared anymore. Whenever something came up which concerns my family, he would rush to see or comfort me. Next to God, he was my stronghold when I was weak & hopeless. I could not even utter a smile during those times and he was very patient in making me realize that the world is still a wonderful place to live in. He helped me re-invent myself for I was already at the end of the rope. He takes care of me when I'm sick and he never fails to remind me to be conscious about my health. He also saw me at my worst physically...when I had chicken pox, allergies all over my body and when I gained weight...but I never saw in his eyes that he was disgusted with my looks.He knows how to put up with my mood swings. Whenever we have a fight, he always asks for forgiveness when he knows he's wrong and he readily accepts my apology when I'm in amiss. He accepted me for who I am...my imperfections included.

What is he really like?...he's sensitive even if he doesn't show it ( and there were times that I hurt him through my jokes)... he's very helpful to other people...he's frank but sometimes tactless... he's very childlike and he always has a smile to offer to everyone...he has his way of making people laugh (kahit minsan corny) :)As you can see, he's not perfect but hey, we are all a work in progress, right? He may not be extra-special, he may not be the "tall, dark yes (hahaha) and handsome" type of guy but he showed me the true meaning of love and commitment. I know you'll read this Dates. I just want to let you know that I love you so much and like you, I am excited to start the journey of our life together :)

pre-nuptial pics

As I've mentioned in my previous post, my weekends are literally booked! Life has been really tiring lately...but Kokoy & I took some time off to finally sched our pre-nuptial pictorial. We had so much fun during the shoot! Here are some pics from our 304 shots!